By Jack Tomas
The Brazilian town of Taubaté has hired Batman to clean up the streets. Yeah, you read right. The town council hired a 50 year old retired ex-military guy and Batman impersonator named Andres Pinheiro to stop bad guys. Taubaté has seen a dramatic rise in violent crime over the last few years. Batman will talk to the kids and tell them to keep their noses clean. Pinheiro says, ”I’m very excited about the mission to attract children and teens to show how the character can help rescue values like family, study, respect for laws and rules of society, care, among others.”
That’s a very noble thought, and if he was just talking to the kids it would be fine. The problem is that he’s actually going to be patrolling the streets of the favelas. Unlike the “real” Batman’s suit, his is made of latex and doesn’t deflect bullets. If he comes across a gang of thugs with guns, what is he going to do? Is he carrying cool Batman gadgetry in his utility belt or is it just plastic? Also, we question whether Batman is really someone you want your kids looking up to. He’s a sociopathic vigilante motivated by revenge and rage over the death of his parents. Unlike the Penguin, Pinheiro’s enemies won’t try and use some weird device that you can get out of to kill him. They’ll just shoot him in the face.