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Chupacabra and Friends

A buddy of mine asked me what I was going to dress up as for Halloween. I told him, “I’m going as half goat-half state trooper. You know, the Trooper Cabra.” After a moment of awkward silence, he admitted to having no idea what I was referring to. Clearly, he didn’t have the same upbringing I did. When I was younger, my grandmother used to warn me that if I went outside after dark, the chupacabra would get me. This ruined my fondness of the outdoors, the darkness, and, to some degree, my grandmother.

While her threats might have been unethical, or at least uninformed, I admit, I can’t argue with results. I behaved around her. That being said, here are a few of my favorite creatures that have been used to keep people’s behaviors in check.

The chupacabra got its name from sucking the blood of goats, which I’m assuming is still better than a Jackberry Smash from TGI Friday’s. Of course, the creature hunts other small animals (misbehaving children). Originally, the animal was believed to be part reptile, part mammal, with spines running down the ridge of the back. Now biologists have verified that most sightings of the animal are usually dogs or coyotes suffering from a form of mange, as is most likely the case of the chupacabra in the video. So maybe my grandmother was right about this one.

Bribing children with Santa has always been a great way to keep them from misbehaving. But what if that isn’t enough? Well, if you’re in Europe, tell them if they make Santa’s naughty list, the Krampus will pay them a torturous visit instead. The choice is yours kiddos: a new XBox One under the tree or getting pitchforked in the kidneys. Sure it sounds like mental abuse, but what’s childhood without a few repressed memories?

The Wendigo
The Wendigo is a demon that lives alone in the forest and eats people, which means he’s probably been featured on Doomsday Preppers. Sadly, the more the demon eats, the hungrier it gets, which results in its emaciated appearance. If a human were to engage in cannibalism, they too could suffer the same fate. The legend of this creature was created to prevent people from eating one another in Algonquin society. This might be an odd PSA style legend, but remember, this was long before one could find a McDonald’s on every street corner.

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