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Chupacabra Finally Captured?


The evil chupacabra has been captured. What brave man would dare confront such a monster? Well it turns out the answer to that question is Arlen Parma, some dude from Ratcliff, Texas. For those of you who don’t know where Ratcliff, Texas is, it’s about a mile from I’m Staying The Hell Away From There, Texas. The beast is currently being held in what I hope is an enchanted cage. I wouldn’t want to be there if/when the mythical monster breaks free from an ordinary, unenchanted cage. Just imagine the property damage a pissed off chupacabra would cause. I’m guessing Farmers Home Insurance doesn’t offer magic critter damage protection. And if you live in an apartment, say good bye to your deposit. While a chupacabra is a definitely a scary find, I’d be much more afraid if someone had captured my student loan creditor. That dude is pure evil.

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