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Hey Latinos, Cut It Out: Thin Beards


In our “Hey Latinos, Cut It Out!” feature we ask you, our Latino brothers and sisters, to cut out some behavior that is embarrassing the rest of us. We do this in order to foster peaceful coexistence with our non-Latino neighbors and so we aren’t ashamed to be seen with you in public.

Hey, Cut It Out: Thin Beards

We are all impressed that you’ve gone through puberty. Wait…no, we aren’t. Every man eventually grows facial hair, though not all men can grow a full-on beard. It’s OK, if you can’t. It doesn’t make you less of a man if your beard is patchy or uneven. However, if you can’t grow a proper beard…don’t do it! You look so unbelievably stupid with that pencil thin non-beard taking up space on your face. It looks like you outlined your jaw with a sharpie or your mom’s mascara. It makes you look unkempt and silly. You will never get a non-fast food or drug dealing job with that beard. Do us all a favor and either shave or grow a proper beard. Seriously, cut it out!

No

 

Yes.

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