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Sofía Vergara’s Co-Stars Are Worse Than The Paparazzi

Sofía Vergara recently learned a lesson that most of us figure out our first year in college. That lesson? If you fall asleep while hanging out with your friends, they will exploit the fact that you are defenseless. You can have a buddy that helped you through a rough breakup or helped you bury that hitchhiker in the desert. But if you take a snooze at a party, that same friend will be the first to Sharpie a wiener onto your exposed, helpless face. It’s nothing personal. That’s just rule number one in the friend handbook. And the worst part isn’t that Sofía Vergara fell asleep at a party like a rookie. She also placed a cocktail napkin onto her face, which caused her friends – the cast of Modern Family – to flock to her like prankster moths to a streetlight.

What?! Why would she purposely place a napkin on her face in public? What is the benefit of that? Is this some fetish I’m not aware of? Is she supposed to be some kind of depressed luchador? It’s almost as if she were daring her friends to Instagram her. Which they did – several times. Even the paparazzi aren’t this cruel. Luckily for most of us, if we get pranked by our friends, the joke never goes beyond our immediate social circle. Sadly, when you’re Sofía Vergara, your social circle consists of the millions of people that watch the popular television show you’re on. Oh, and anyone who has an Instagram app on their phone. But I really can’t make fun of her. I don’t know how tiring it is to be a celebrity and a mom and an actress. I assume that if you’re willing to sleep with a napkin on your face in public, then you probably deserve to catch a few winks. And, if you have the kind of friends Sofía has, then it really pays to have the kind of sense of humor Sofía’s has.

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