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How To Survive Post-World Cup Loss Depression


Yesterday I watched as many of my Mexican friends, and my colleagues here at TuVez, were dealt a devastating blow when Mexico was knocked out of the World Cup by the Dutch. They went through the usual stages of grief: denial, bargaining, anger, etc. But at the end of the day you just have to accept it. You don’t have to like it, but you must come to terms with your team’s world cup loss. Life, as the cliche goes, does go on. But the depression can last for days afterwards and can really get under your skin. I’m by no means a mental healthcare professional. I took three semesters of psych and then decided to major in theater instead. So, if you are having real depression problems, please seek professional help. But if you just want to set some tulips on fire in revenge, listen up.

It’s not just you

It’s important to get perspective. Your team isn’t the only one that’s lost. Only one team can win this thing and every other country around the world feels the same way you do. Maybe it would help to grab a beer with one of your buddies from another losing country and talk it over. And by grab a beer a mean one or two.

Alcohol is only a temporary fix

So, your team lost and you decided to get drunk. It’s not the most mature decision but it’s an acceptable short term coping mechanism. But you cannot stay drunk for days. You need to get your crap together and go to work, yo. Drinking too much only leads to further problems and violence, which reminds me:

Don’t be a sore loser

Your Dutch co-worker Jorgen Van Der Beek is ecstatic that his team won as you would be if Mexico had managed to win. It is vital that you accept defeat with quiet dignity and grace. Giving his toilet an upper decker or peeing in his cup o’ noodles is not going to change the outcome of the game. It will only make you look like a vindictive pendejo.

Think of the good times

Look, your team won but they had a good run. I mean, unless your team got knocked out earlier in which case that sucks, but still. Mexico wasn’t favored to even get this far and they showed the world that they had chops. Be a glass is half full guy and not a glass is half empty. You’ll be a happier person.

There is always next time

Maybe this was just the kind of defeat that your team needed to get their act together to win it all in four years. Sometimes our defeats teach us more than our victories. So, maybe Mexico will go all the way next time if they learned from their mistakes. Like, letting the Dutch score in the last five minutes.

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